clockwork

Thought, knew it all.
The verses, the colors, and the stories.
A day, long gone. Perhaps, a September.
Thoughts were left to pickle,
In a tightly shut jar

Yesterday smelled a whiff. Pungent.
Not what I thought was brewing,
Like finding stale broth in a freshly heated oven.
Looked away. Other senses reigned havoc.
Yet again. Clockwork. The turn of events.

Silks.Flowers.Scarves.Wine.
Oysters, the pearl left behind,
Floating away, keeping the mirage alive.
Drank from it. It pretended to quench thirst.
Believed. Tick-tock. The turn of events.


Untitled again

In slumber am awake, thinking these thoughts
Dreaming those dreams, packed away for future use..
Am crawling out of me, touching the peripheries
Of the impossibles, of the could have beens

Rubbing my eyes, I let the morning creep under my skin
The dew on the grass unsettles my feet
I stay and move. I share and withhold. I shut my ears and listen
A beat. A whisper.A murmur.A breath. A word

I sense sensuousness devoid of sensibilities
I wander to that place I have seldom been
I wait for the dawn and the dusk
I shrug the sun away

I touch. And again
It has been. And never been
I hear a retort. My worldly self
Its here. And am awake

Untitled

Angeethee thandi padi hai
Bahot dinon se kuch paka nahin hai
Joothe bartanon par dhool chipak gayi hai
Darwaza bahot dinon baad khula hai

Padosi khidkiyon se taakne lage hain
Kuch uth kar ghar tak bhee aayein hai
Gali ke bacche gilli chhod idhar daud aayein hain
Is makan mein bhoot rahte hain, aisa suna tha

Khidki ke pat akad gaye hain
Lohe ke chhad abhi bhee tainaat hain
Pair patakti, oonghti hawa kamre mein fail gayi hai
Manjhi see roshni dhumil se farsh par chan rahi hai

Kursi tirchi, toote sirhaane ke saath khadi hai
Ek adhkhuli kitab mez se giri pad rahi hai
Aisa maloom padta hai jaise koi jaldi mein tha
Shayad achanak hee bahar jaane kaa bulaawaa aa gaya tha

Sab kuch thama sa lag raha hai

kisi kee zindagi ka saar

aaj kuch log mere ghar aaye the
do ne mukhaute pahne the
aur baaki do ne chaashni zabaan par chipkayi thee
charon kee jebon se kuch nikla pad raha tha

maine thoda jhuk kar dekha, thoda mudi bhee
shayad laal rang ke rumaal the
ek kursi khaali padi thee, khidki ke neeche
us par baith main unhe dekhne lagi

sabki nazarein poore kamre me daud rahee thee
aisa maloom padta tha jaise main bhee uska hissa hoon
ek ne meri aankhon mein dekha aur nazrein neechi kar lee
baaki teen use sakhti se dekhne lage

main saham gayi.mausam kuch badla sa lagne laga tha
maine unse poocha, "bahot door se aayein hain..?"
Wo shoonya me niharte rahe
maine socha shayad suna na ho, to maine phir dohraya

unme se ek utha, aur darwaze ke bahar kadam rakh diya
doosre ne kaha, "main bhee chalta hoon"
teesra muskaraya, aur daudte hue seedhiyon se utarta gaya
chautha kuch der baitha raha aur phir chal diya

maine dekha mez par wo laal rumaal rakhe huein hain
"bhool gaye shaayad", kahkar main unki oar badh gayi
ek mein anh ke tukde the, doosre mein matmailee see lalak
teesre mein raakh thee, shayad kisi rishtey kee

Chauthe ko kholne ka man nahin kiya
Kisi ne apni zindagi ka saar meri mez par bicha chhoda tha

Sukoon

Khidkiyon ke sheeshe ke paar
Bauchaaron ke beech
Tharrate patton ke galiyaaron mein
Mera koi ehsaas simta baitha hai

Hawa ke rukh se behaal
Raaston kee geeli fislan par ladkhadata
Chal chal kar rukta wo ehsaas
Ab kuch samajh me aaya hai

Kisi yaad ko pakadkar
Kal ke kalpurzon se nikal
Aaj kee safed chaadar odh
Phir koi saamne aayaa hai

Feeki see muskaan shuru hui hai
Hothon se nikal
Aankhon kee palokon se chipak
Us ehsaas se jaa mili hai

Is chhat kee munder par bahot baar aayi hoon
Bikhree hui rahti thi humesha
Aaj ek tinka nahin hai
Wo bhi sukoon mein lagti hai

kuch adhoora sa...

kuch ruka sa hai
fansa hai kahin
dhuan saa,dhund sa
thama hai kahin

talaash kar rahi hoon
andhera hai,nami bhi
tatolti hoon kuch khaas
milta hai fisalta bhi

ab sochti hoon ruk jaun
shayad thak gayi hoon.

A walk in the rain

Its strange how when you think of writing about something-you don’t know where to start and when you do you can’t stop. As a friend interestingly pointed out-I start speaking in the second person the moment am intending to criticize myself and it even goes to a third person when the criticism is severe like for instance-they all are like that-the people of the world…blah blah.Works when you want to shift the guilt...eh? (There I go again!)

So coming back to where I started-this happened on a late morning, couple of days ago. On a day when a particular news channel-“India V.T” or was it “Kal Aaj Aur Kal” was announcing that the city was to go down the drains (literally, possible and believable) with videos marked “files” showing waves lashing out of some sea. On another channel, a hassled looking guy with a hooded jacket was standing besides a Tata Sumo with 4 guys on top of it. He was saying- “Jaisa ki aap dekh sakhte ek baar phir Mumbai hui behaal..Aaiye jaane iska aankhon dekha haal”. (Man! this guy was good at rhyming!) “Hum khade hain Mumbai ke ek vyasta ilaake me jahan log fanse hue hain...wo jahan ban pad raha hai...Apni zindagi ke liye latke hue hai.” The camera just then zoomed on a passerby busy happily talking on the cell phone followed by a voice-“gaadivar focus kara “(Roughly translated to – focus on the car) ” and the camera zoomed in where it was to be meant to in the first instance. Before the man could finish elaborating on the inconveniences of subjecting one’s butt to the roof of a vehicle (pardon my language-or is it unwarranted till I use its synonym..a certain a**?) –I swiched off the I-Box (The ‘I’ does not stand for Internet). I looked outside the window. It was drizzling and decided to take a walk in the rain.

As I came near the gate of my building the watchman called out (should he be called watch-person keeping in mind the gender equality trend in line with the likes of chairperson, etc?).”Maidum - aaj haiee taid hai haiee taid-aaj duniya khatam hone waali hai”.As I looked at him nonchalantly patting the tobacco leaves and baring his beetle leaf stained teeth-I was surprised by the unremarkable impact of doomsday on this guy. He might as well have said – “Maidum aaj doodh waala nai aayegaa”

As I tugged my jacket closer and walked on the road, I saw the shutters of “Siddhivinayak” drawn up and sacks of grains being pulled out to display. Heard Raoji – the store owner call out – “Walk pe niklaa hai kya...bain-staind pe khoopach public hai…aap bi jao..Chutti hai…he he”. I smiled at him and continued walking. A couple of rickshawaalahs were gathered at a tea stall. One said-“aaj suboo se hee carter pe ricksaa lagaya.Do ghante ke andar paanch sau...khaali idhar se udhar...he he”. So Doomsday Tourism was turning out to be quite profitable for some people. There were some BMC vehicles marked on the roadside apparently in anticipation of the calamity. Prolonged periods of sleep curled up on a seat is said to induce high levels of action orientation or so I thought looking at our “rakshaks” enjoying their late morning siesta.

The rain had stopped. The sun was shining with determination against all odds as if to disprove the media and weather bureau speculation of its performance. I smiled hearing a passerby on a by-cycle singing, “Dhaga li laagli kadaa paani them padaa...”

And I walked back home